Now that the Hogs have had their bye week to rest up and let the Dick brothers battle it out for the right to lead the offense into battle, it’s time for us to resume our tradition of Q&A sessions with our fellow SEC bloggers.

Today’s chat is with Jeremy from the Mississippi State Sports Blog…read on for his insights into the MSU quarterback controversy, Sylvester Croom and fan expectations. Then, be sure to head over to his site to read our own “expert” analysis.

Last time we saw quarterback Wesley Carroll, he was slicing and dicing the Hogs’ defense for four touchdowns and 421 yards. But MSU’s starter all this year has been Tyson Lee. Considering the Bulldogs’ record, has there been much of a clamor to turn the reins over to Carroll? Who do you think is the better quarterback for the team?

Carroll really seemed to regress at the beginning of the season. He was also quick to roll out of the pocket, causing a lot of plays to break down before they really needed too. Tyson seems to be willing to stay in the pocket and get the pass off properly at the risk of taking the hit. He is also more mobile that Carroll which gives us the scramble ability.

I am not sure if one is really better than the other, but Tyson was improving more in each game and I think that is why Croom ended up going with him.

Sylvester Croom had a nice season last year, but overall, is 20-37 in his five seasons in Starkville. How satisfied or dissatisfied are Bulldog fans with him?

I think most fans came into this season with high hopes after last year. Many were thinking we would have 9, maybe 10 wins and a trip to a better bowl. We lost some players before the season even started due to off-campus shenanigans. Then we had to make shifts on the o-line due to injuries before the LaTech game. From there, it just went down hill.

Most fans now are ready to see some kind of change. It is obvious that the offensive system is not up to par with what you need to compete in the SEC. If we can see some sort of changes in the coaching staff, especially in the area of special teams and offense, that would give Croom another year to get things back on the straight and narrow.

On a related note, what would you say the average MSU fan’s demands are for the football program? A bowl game every year?

I don’t think it is realistic for us to expect a national championship every year, or even an SEC championship. I think a solid 8-9 wins per season, a good bowl game (cotton, peach, etc) and mabye the occasional trip to the SEC championship is reasonable.

Give us a quick scouting report on the Bulldogs - strengths, weaknesses. And give us the name of a player or two who could make the Hogs life miserable on Saturday.

Our strength is our defense. Our strength on defense used to be our line and our safeties. However, Jessie Bowman tore his knee up in the Alabama game and Derek Pegues (safety) suffered a concussion, but should play.

On offense, we have strong running backs with Anthony Dixon, Christian Ducre and Arnil Stalworth. We have some good receivers if we could get the ball to them.

The main thing for our team is having the offense generate enough momentum that the defense isn’t on the field the entire game and has time to rest.

Finally, the Hogs and the Bulldogs have been locked all year long in an epic and thrilling battle for last place in the SEC West. Be as objective as you can be: Which team is worse?

At least the Hogs have an offense of some sort. I really think our team is the worst in the West and have probably voted them that way all but once or twice in the SEC Power Poll this week. I hope Mississippi State can pull out a win at home, but history shows

Good luck this weekend and against LSU.

With another matchup against the Ol’ Ball Coach on the horizon, we were pleased to do another Q&A with the folks at the excellent South Carolina blog, Garnet & Black Attack (here’s our interview with them from last year). Read on for their thoughts on the Cocks’ annual QB controversy, Spurrier’s job performance and much more (also, while you’re at it be sure to click over to their site to read our A’s to their Q’s):

1. The Gamecocks come into Saturday’s game with a 6-3 overall record and a 3-3 mark in conference play. Are Gamecock fans pleased with the team’s performance this season?

We’re tentatively pleased. Going into the season, I said that I hoped we would finish 8-4 and make a decent bowl game. Those goals are still in sight if we can beat Arkansas and Clemson. I would be ecstatic if we could win 9 by winning out, but I (obviously) don’t like our chances against Florida. 8 will be satisfying, though, considering that 8 will probably net us an Outback Bowl bid on New Years Day.

If we fail to make those goals by losing to your guys, Clemson, or both, a lot of people, including yours truly, will be disappointed. And there’s some disappoint anyways because we lost to Vanderbilt, which in hindsight seems inexplicable now. We also failed to capitalize on golden opportunities to upset LSU or Georgia, which will leave some people feeling that despite our 8 wins if we get there, we failed to break into the league’s upper echelon. However, I think most people will be happy with 8 and a New Years Day bowl after last year’s late-season skid and this year’s slow start.

2. Chris Smelley or Stephen Garcia - which quarterback do you prefer to see starting for the Gamecocks these days?

Like most Gamecocks fans, I prefer Garcia. He’s got a better arm, is a little more accurate, and he’s mobile, which comes in handy for us because he’s able to create plays when our weak offensive line collapses. I also think he’s a better leader and performer under pressure, although that still remains to be seen to a certain degree..

However, unlike other Gamecocks fans, I don’t think Smelley is chopped liver. Chris has helped us win big games in the past, and if needs to come in Saturday, I have faith that he will perform well. His numbers are actually quite good, although he tends to throw a really awful interception or two each game. Chris was a world beater against Ole Miss. I just think Garcia is a little bit better, especially due to his scrambling abilities.

3. South Carolina’s defense has been stout this season, holding the team’s opponents to an average of 250.7 yards of total offense per game, the lowest average in the SEC. How do you think the Arkansas offense matches up with the Gamecocks’ defense?

I want to say is that we should play well. We have a strong secondary that should be able to defend the down-field pass well and our front guys should be able to do well against a young Arkansas offensive line, keeping Michael Smith from taking off and putting pressure on Casey Dick. I think pressuring Dick is key; from what I’ve seen of Arkansas, Dick can hit passes when he has time, but tends to make mistakes when he’s got a big guy in his face. Forcing a couple of interceptions could help us take control of this game early.

However, I have a lot of respect for Bobby Petrino’s play-calling ability, and I have no doubt that he’ll have a great gameplan ready for the Gamecocks. I know that Petrino likes to run the ball out of power formations with multiple tightends sometimes only to spring an attempt for a big play when the defense is expecting run. If the Hogs are able to establish the run with Smith, I worry that Petrino will lure us into being susceptible to a down-field strike or two. Hopefully, we’ll stop the run and will play smart if Petrino tries to catch us off guard.

4. Let’s look at the game’s other match-up: What’s your assessment of how the Gamecocks’ offense will fare against the Hogs’ defense?

Offensively we are not a great team. We move the ball well at times, but we are susceptible to a good pass rush, don’t have much of a running game, and have had problems with turnovers (although less so with Garcia than Smelley). We’ve had a good quarter here and there, but I really think that the only complete game we’ve played offensively this year was against Ole Miss.

That said, I think we can move the ball against Arkansas. Your defense hasn’t been as good this year as some of the others we’ve played, so I’m hoping to see improvement against a young group. I think we should be able to run a little better against you guys than we have in past weeks, and if we can establish the run, lots of things should open up for us.

The key for us on offense, I think, will be turnovers. Tulsa moved the ball well against the Hogs but lost because you came up with big defensive plays when you needed them. We can’t give up those sorts of turnovers or it might cost us the game.

5. Four seasons into the Steve Spurrier era, what’s your assessment of the job he’s done in Columbia?

I would tentatively say he’s done a good job. Last year was disappointing because the fast start gave us high hopes, but overall he’s been more successful than other coach at Carolina over his first three and a half years. He’s also recruited fairly well and has another big class on the way this year.

However, I think that he needs to take us to the next level soon. We’re tired of winning six or seven games a year and playing in the Liberty Bowl. We have a chance to do well this year–eight wins and a New Years Day bowl will be a great step forward. We have to make it happen, though.

6. Finally, prediction for Saturday’s game and the rest of the Gamecocks’ season?

I think this game will be close for most of the day but that we’ll pull away a little in the late third or fourth quarter. I’m going to say that the final score will be 27-17 in favor of the Gamecocks.

As for the rest of the season, I think we’ll lose to Florida, beat Clemson, and play in either the Outback or the Chick-fil-A Bowls.

If you have read the Ole Miss blog The Red Solo Cup this week, you will know that the guys over there have been having quite the time ragging on the Hogs and their fans. Those without thin skins will have to admit that the week-long Razorback-bash-a-thon has been pretty funny. The Cup is one of the more entertaining and feistier SEC blogs, and we knew its authors were just the ones to provide the scoop on all things Rebel before Saturday night’s big dust-up. So read on to find out how Ole Miss fans are responding to you know who, which Rebel players are primed to make life miserable for the Hogs and where the Razorbacks rank on Ole Miss’ rivalry list. Thanks, Cuppers, for your time. [Editor’s Note: Shrimpboat captains and those who don’t like swearing may be offended by certain portions of the Q&A.]

It’s been brought to our attention that your coach might have some Arkansas connections. How is Houston Nutt doing so far? Has the team underperformed, overachieved or met expectations?

How is Houston Nutt doing thus far? He’s alright. He’s better than Orgeron at every aspect of coaching aside from recruiting which, realistically speaking, is all we were looking for out of a new head coach. As far as the team is concerned, I would say that they’re still on track to meet our expectations. Most contributors to the Cup were predicting a six-, maybe seven-win season back in September. Currently, that is not at all out of the question. Beating up on Memphis (who normally play the Rebs close as they consider us their biggest rival) and snatching one away from the Gators in the swamp elevated the expectations of many, but the loss to South Carolina brought most of the Rebel fans back to where they needed to be.

Along those same lines, you guys are 3-4, but with all four losses being close games (seven points or less) you could be looking at a gaudy 6-1 or 7-0 record with a few breaks here and there. Does your current record accurately reflect the team’s ability, and if not what would you say it should be?

While our losses have been epically heartbreaking, one cannot lose sight of the fact that the Rebels did not win a single game in conference last season. Zero, zilch, nada. This team is essentially that exact same team from last year with a new quarterback (Jevan Snead), halfback rotation (Eason, Bolden, Davis) and second-string nose tackle (Jerrell Powe). Oh, yeah, they’ve got a new coach too. I want to say that we should have beaten Vanderbilt, but they did to us exactly what they did to Auburn and South Carolina; force a lot of turnovers. We routinely play Alabama to a close loss decided in the fourth quarter, so no surprise there. Tyrone Nix was Spurrier’s defensive coordinator last season so that would explain Chris Smelley’s career outing a couple of weeks ago.

“But, the Florida game,” some cry.

We Rebels have an all time winning record against the Gators, with an overwhelmingly favorable record at Florida. I don’t think anybody can explain why, but historically we’ve had their number in Gainesville. It’s just one of those many, many bizarre things about SEC football which makes it the greatest dad-gummed sport on Earth.

How have Ole Miss fans responded to Houston? Is the honeymoon still in full force?

It depends on who you’re asking. Most people were just elated to see O gone and subsequently replaced by someone who, at least, had some head coaching experience (of the last four coaches Ole Miss has hired, only Houston Nutt has had prior experience as a head coach). There are a few who have emphatically become baptized into the Church of the Right Reverend Houston Dale Nutt. I’m sure you had these crazies at Arkansas, too. No head coach at any football program anywhere should have a platoon of super-lame, obnoxious, kool-aid drinkin’ followers … okay, maybe Pete Carroll, but that’s understandable and all, what with his dashing good looks and media savvy …

Oh, but where were we? Ah, right, the Houston Nutt honeymoon. Look, we know that he says wacky stuff like “yehaw” and “special” all of the time. We know that he banged a weatherlady (go get ‘em, tiger). We know that he’s oftentimes self absorbed. We know all of these things. But here’s what a lot of you Arkansas fans don’t get: we’ve had fucking batshit motherfucking crazy as a head coach. His name was Ed Orgeron. He had the temperament, body odor, and IQ of a shrimpboat captain. He hated interacting with the fans and media. He bled Red Bull. He was unintelligible. He received counseling for his issues with domestic violence. He was arrested for getting into a bar fight… in Baton Rouge. All of this got him placed on probation from the Athletic Department of the University of MIAMI!

You Hogs love to talk about how horrible Houston Nutt was. Naw, lawya. We know horrible. Trust us. Houston Nutt doesn’t hold a candle to Eddie O.

Give us a quick scouting report on your team: what are its strengths? Weaknesses? Secret weapons? (We promise not to forward your replies to the Razorback coaching staff.)

(Read on …)

Welcome to the third and final part of our Q&A with the world’s funniest Hog fan, Matt Besser (click here for part one and here for part two). In this installment, Matt discusses the Atlanta Falcons’ karma, which Razorbacks would make the best companions on a cross-country trip and the celebrities he’s discussed the Hogs with. Many thanks to Matt for taking the time to talk with us and many thanks to our dear friend Chris Cranford for his help in setting up the interview. Now, on with the show:

What’s your take on Bobby Petrino? Are you excited about the hire?

Oh yeah. I’m completely excited. I could care less what he did to the Falcons. That’s what you get, Falcons, when you have a dog killer on your team. That’s the karma that comes back at you.

I think it’s completely unfair how ESPN has picked on him, way beyond what he has done. It’s almost like he killed somebody.

I’m ready to see some passing. God, it has been so long. I can’t even remember. It’s amazing to me that Marcus Monk is in the NFL because he hasn’t been able to show off the last two years at all, it seems to me.

But, thank God we’re turning that around. Of course, this will be a really tough year, but I can have patience with it. I hope that with recruiting, they’re bringing in the type of guys that we need.

Switching gears a little bit, this is a hypothetical question: If you had to take a cross-country road trip with three current or former Razorback players or coaches, who would you pick and why?

Wow. Well, Matt Jones ‘cause he’s bringing the bowl!

You’d have to take Holtz ‘cause he’s such an interesting talker.

Of course, McFadden and Sidney Moncrief would be my two favorite players, but I’m not sure if they would be the most fun on a cross-country trip.

I might want to bring Kareem Reid, if you remember him. He was an exciting point guard. He seems really funny. He’d be fun. Darrell Walker might be fun too.

I’m trying to think of football players. I’d like to hear Ben Cowin’s side of the story. What happened to get him suspended for the Orange Bowl – I’ve always wanted to know that story.

If any of your readers know that story, I’ve always tried to find out and never could figure it out.

We’ve got a couple of serious historians who might be able to chip in on that.

Yeah, if they could get why he was suspended. I never understood that.

If you had to pick one Razorback coach or player that you thought had some improv potential, who would you select?

Maybe Holtz. I’m trying to think. Definitely not Matt Jones – he talks too slow. He’s also one of my favorite players ever, I should mention. God, all of those overtime wins were some of the most exciting games I’ve ever watched.

I don’t know – I guess I’d have to go with Holtz. He is funny.

What about your least favorite opposing player or team of all time?

Well, it’d have to be Texas. I don’t know how any Razorback fan my age or older could answer anything but Texas. Younger, I can understand because we’re no longer in the Southwest Conference, and we don’t play them as much.

I’m really glad they’re back on the football schedule. I almost wish we had put it off a year, but Texas is definitely it.

It’s corny, but really funny and very influential to me: Craig O’Neill, he was a disc jockey. He’s a sports guy now, right?

Yeah.

He used to be a disc jockey in Little Rock, and he was really funny. He’d do these crank calls, and I know you can find this online somewhere too. But, he does this really corny thing where he calls up, and I think he’s talking to the athletic director at UT if not the coach and explaining to them that they misspelled “Texas” in the end zone, and they added an extra “S.” To hear the Texas guy go, “You gotta get rid of that ‘s,’” and he’s like, “There’s no time, we can’t do it.”

It’s such a simple joke, but I thought it was the greatest thing ever. [Editor’s note: Matt is right. You can find this call online. Just click here to listen.]

Craig O’Neill was pretty hilarious back in the day.

Oh, yeah. His crank calls very much influenced my life.

Was that going through your mind when you did the crank call CD?

I think it formed my mind rather than going through my mind, but yes.

Fair enough. Drop a name or two on us. Who is the biggest celeb that you’ve discussed the Hogs with or talked trash about football or basketball?

A lot of my friends know me for being a Razorback fan. I wouldn’t say a lot of my friends are necessarily into college football, but the ones that are know that I’m a Razorback fan.

I didn’t really tease him because there’s nothing to tease him about, but I’ve discussed the Trojans with Will Farrell and them humiliating the Razorbacks and how that upset me.

Yesterday, we posted part one of our interview with Matt Besser, comedian, actor and lifelong Razorback fan. In part two, Matt shares his account of attending the 2007 LSU game in person, his thoughts on Mitch Mustain and much more. Read on, and enjoy:

In all of your years as a fan, what was the most exhilarating Hog victory you’ve experienced?

Three come to mind that I’m sure a lot of people my age would share. The Orange Bowl of course was just amazing. I’ve always wanted to make a movie about that whole time period. Steve Little, I should also mention, was a hero of mine as a kid. He’s the one who at the time had the record-breaking field-goal kick, who sadly later was in a car accident and paralyzed. He passed away a few years after that.

That whole team was just fascinating; Holtz suspended some of the players before the game, and our back-up running back, Roland Sales, had such a great game. It was just a storybook game. No one gave that team any credit to win. It was great.

And then there was the U.S. Reed shot that beat Louisville in basketball. I remember watching that game and getting really pissed off that we were going to lose. I turned off the TV right before he shot it, I was so mad. I was like, “Ah, I should turn it back on.” I turned it back on right as the ball was going through the hoop. That was amazing.

But the most amazing was last year, because I was there, at the LSU game. To actually be in the stadium and witness a great game, I had never done that before. To be there was amazing, especially since when we walked to the game — we walked from the parking lot into the stadium — we got hazed so bad by all the fans, just me and my wife. We walked past the whole marching band, and they were screaming at us, “Tiger bait! Tiger bait!”

We had these drunk rednecks, and their kids were coming up to us. These like 12-year-old kids were yelling at us, “Why don’t you go home? Your coach is going to fired next year! You guys are nothing!” And their dads were going, “Yeah, you tell ‘em kid!” They were really aggressive to us before we even walked into the stadium.

And then we walk in, and we’re not in the Razorback section. We’re right in the middle of all the season-ticket holders. We’re in a sea of gold and purple. The people around us – they weren’t being mean, but they were being patronizing, like we were sick. Like, “Oh, how cute of you to show up and watch your Razorbacks get beat!” They were just so condescending.

I sat in my seat that whole first half. It was really close. I just simmered because I couldn’t scream and yell because I would have gotten throttled.

By the end of the game, it was unbelievable. I was crying. We ran down to the field. All of the fans were out back when the Razorbacks exited the locker room. It was great.

What were you wearing to attract attention?

Just my Razorback windbreaker.

After the game was over, did you worry about your physical safety, or were people just quietly milling out?

No, it wasn’t that kind of scene. I think they were too embarrassed. I wasn’t really focused on that. I was just jumping up and down. It was a miracle.

Does your wife share your Razorback obsession?

No, not at all.

Does she tolerate it, or is she horrified by it?

She’s not horrified. She’s very supportive. She also went with me to one of the worst games I’ve ever seen, when we played USC at USC. We got throttled. I forget what that score was, but it was something crazy.

I remember she said, “I’m going to go get a hot dog.” By the time she went to get the hot dog and came back, they had scored 14 points on us. People were being rude – they were just screaming at us the whole time, the Trojan fans were. That was terrible.

Would you consider that the most depressing loss of your time as a fan?

It was humiliating, but there was nothing at stake really. More depressing are losses when something’s at stake, like a bowl game.

I got really depressed when Sidney Moncrief lost to Larry Bird. That really depressed me. He was my guy, and I thought he was going to go all the way. At that point, I didn’t really know who Larry Bird was. I was like, “Who’s this white guy beating Sidney Moncrief?”

And there was some bowl game when I was a kid – it might have been the year after the Orange Bowl even – it was probably pretty soon after that or maybe even right before it. I think it was the Fiesta Bowl. I think it ended in a tie, 10-10, to UCLA – I forget who it was. [editor’s note: Arkansas and UCLA played to a 10-10 in the 1978 Fiesta Bowl - details are here.]

As I kid I was like, “It can’t end in a tie.” I had just gotten a Mattel electronic football game, and I think I started tearing up after the game. I was like [says in a crying voice], “I’ll give back my electronic football game if we can win this game!”

We saw that you told the Arkansas Times that you thought that it was “bullshit” that McFadden didn’t win the Heisman. We were wondering if your anger had subsided or if you still feel the same say. For the record, we agree.

It’s such bullshit — at least it was Florida, which isn’t much better than USC — but when USC guys win, it’s like, “Come on.” The whole team goes on to be professional, pretty much. I think they had four first-round draft picks last year. USC is on a whole other level, and it’s like, of course Matt Leinhart’s awesome when he’s surrounded by pro lineman.

We’ll get a couple of those guys, but not to the degree that some of those perennial schools do.

To get back to last year, Florida’s just a much better team than Arkansas. McFadden didn’t have anything around him like Tebow did, unfortunately. And the fact that we had zero passing game – every team just planned on shutting down McFadden and Jones. Despite that, how well they did was amazing.

Tebow was not under that same kind of pressure at all. I think that guy’s great, but there’s no way he’s as good as McFadden, and we’ll see what happens in the NFL. That’s all I gotta say.

Arkansans are always sensitive to media bias and people looking down their nose at Arkansas. It felt to me that if McFadden had played for, not even a team like Florida, but say, like, or Alabama or Georgia or LSU, I felt like he probably would have been much more of lock to win it.

I don’t know. Within the SEC, I think a lot of those teams, I can say, don’t get the same respect. It’s sad that the closer you are to the media centers, the more they respect the teams.

I can’t stand USC. They get such media attention. I can’t wait for them to lose this year, and I can’t wait for Mitch Mustain to never play for them.

What was your take on that whole Mitch Mustain- Houston Nutt saga?

I think they were both lame. Look, I guess I can’t blame Mitch Mustain very much, but I do wish that he had stuck it out. I also wish that they had fired Houston a year earlier.

I think I’m irrational about the whole thing. I know you shouldn’t blame that kid. He should get what he deserves, as far as a good opportunity. But man, I wish he was our quarterback this year. That’s the dead honest truth. Or last year, even more. We could have been something.

Hogs fans could use a laugh or two following the debacle in Lexington. As part of our ongoing effort to speed the healing process, we thought it would be a good time to publish part one of our recent interview with the world’s funniest Hog fan, Matt Besser.

The Little Rock native and proud Razorback fan is a founding member of the improvisational comedy group the Upright Citizens Brigade (UCB). From 1998 to 2000, UCB, which by then included current Saturday Night Live star Amy Poehler, had a critically acclaimed sketch show on Comedy Central. Besser also was a co-creator of the MTV prank show “Stung” and a co-creator and star of “Crossballs,” a parody of cable news programs that ran on Comedy Central in 2004. His other works include the truly hilarious prank-call album “May I Help You (Dumbass)?“ and roles in “Junebug,” “Walk Hard: The Dewey Cox Story,” “The Bernie Mac Show,” “Fraiser,” “Spin City” and more. (For detailed overviews of his career, visit here and here.)

We had a blast talking with Matt, and very much appreciate his taking the time to visit with us. And now, read on for his thoughts on the wit and wisdom of Lou Holtz, why calling the Hogs is either like yoga or Mass, and much more:

Tell us how your Razorback fandom began. Was there a particular player or season that started you off as a fan?

I’d say I got into the basketball and football teams at the same time. I’m 41, so I was around for The Triplets, and Sidney Moncrief was probably my first hero. I still have his Sports Illustrated cover hanging in my garage. That was a great team. And the Ron Calcagni Razorbacks football team, that whole era.

The Orange Bowl over Oklahoma?

The Orange Bowl is probably my favorite game of all time, or at least top two.

That was a particularly good year for the Hogs. You picked a good time to become a fan.

Lou Holtz, I was also a huge fan of. He was really funny. I think that’s a big part of why I was attracted to the Razorbacks: I thought Lou Holtz was really funny. He is really funny. Too bad he’s a born-again, or whatever.

I had his “Holtz’ Quotes.” He had something called “The Kitchen Quarterback,” and I bought that book.

You had a recent stand-up show called “Woo Pig Sooie.” Tell us how you came to name it that.

The whole show is about religion, and how I don’t like it, pretty much. If I had anything like that in the title, no one would have come and seen the show. I thought I’d fool people into making them think it was about sports or making them think that’s just a funny name, “Woo Pig Sooie.” I think most people don’t even know what “woo pig sooie” is, if they’re not sports fan or they’re not from Arkansas.

I did make them call the Hogs at the end of my show. My basic point was that the Razorbacks are kind of my religion or my obsession. I pray to — I pray to Petrino at this point.

There’s something about the Razorbacks that’s unique to Arkansas — I don’t know how many states have just one team that the entire state coalesces around. We don’t have a pro team, so everybody’s into the Razorbacks. Everybody’s watching the Razorbacks on Saturday.

Are you able to keep with the team pretty well out in Los Angeles? Do you listen to them over the Internet or watch them over the Internet?

I did. There’s nothing more pathetic than listening to a football game over the Internet, but I’ve done that. Luckily, the sports packages on satellite TV have improved that in recent years, where I can see a lot of the games. Although I see that certain games now are pay-per-view from Arkansas. I would hate to have had to pay for that Louisiana-Monroe game. [editor’s note: this interview took place shortly after the ULM game.]

When you asked people to call the Hogs at the end of your show, what was the reaction like? Confusion?

Confusion. I would focus on people who weren’t energetic enough and make them do it over again. But I think for a lot of people, it’s like yoga. They feel a sense of joy and relief from calling the Hogs. There’s really not much difference between calling the Hogs and doing Catholic mass.

(stay tuned for parts 2 and 3 of our interview with Matt, coming soon)

After last week’s big win over Auburn, Hog fans are anxiously awaiting Saturday’s match-up against Kentucky in Lexington. We always look forward to games against the Wildcats because it gives us a chance to check in with one of our favorite bloggers, Truzenzuzex from the superb A Sea of Blue. Many thanks to him for his time. So, pull up a chair and read on to get Truzenzuzex’s take on the team’s quarterback controversy, fans’ expectations of Rich Brooks and who is lower on his holiday shopping list - Bobby Petrino or Rick Pitino.

Update: Be sure to also check out our answers to Tru’s questions over at his site.

One of your recent blog postings had the headline, “Does Kentucky now officially have a quarterback controversy?” Well … do you? And if so, who would you like to see have the job — Mike Hartline or Randall Cobb?

As far as the Big Blue Nation is concerned, we definitely do have a quarterback controversy. It is said that the most popular guy on any football team is the backup quarterback, and that is certainly true in spades right now as far as UK fans are concerned.

I don’t think either Hartline or Cobb are SEC quarterback material right now, but I think a combination of the two might be. Hartline is struggling, as much with his receivers as with his passing, but his decision-making is generally pretty good. I think the biggest problem with Hartline is his youth and inexperience, which also happens to be the biggest problem with Cobb. Hartline also has a marginal arm for a quarterback in the SEC, and that has given him some trouble.

But I think if they split snaps at QB, some good things will happen because it forces the defense to react. When Hartline has the ball, linebackers and corners can sit on the routes, giving the D-line time to come in and make a play, or force a bad throw. But with Cobb, the linebackers have to always be thinking about him taking off and getting big chunks of yards, so they really have a lot to think about, because he can throw it, also. That forces errors, and creates offensive opportunities.

Unfortunately, Cobb is also our best receiver, and he can’t throw the ball to himself.

It doesn’t look like things are going to get any easier for your struggling offense: This week brought the sad news that wide receiver Dicky Lyon Jr.’s UK career is over after he tore knee ligaments in Saturday’s loss to South Carolina. How big of a blow is his injury and which receiver is most likely to take up the slack?

Well, as I said above, Randall Cobb is our best receiver now that Lyons is injured. Obviously, that puts a lot more stress both on him and Hartline — it stinks for UK, but that’s just the way it is. Couple that with the fact that Cobb will not be 100% for the rest of the year due to a high ankle sprain he suffered about 3 games ago, and it spells trouble.

Brooks has suggested he might bring in 4* wideout Aaron Boyd a bit, and Boyd has been the one receiver that hasn’t really dropped the football. But he had a bout of mononucleosis in the pre-season which almost forced a red-shirt, and he still hasn’t adjusted to the speed and power of the league yet.

Job security in the SEC, where fans are known for their patience and reasonable expectations, is a very fragile thing (see: Tuberville, Tommy). With your offense struggling and tough games on the horizon, is there any significant discontent with Rich Brooks?

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Here at RazorbackExpats, we’ve been looking forward to the Auburn game all season. Not because we’re anticipating a win, but because it gives us a chance to chat with one of the funniest and most talented bloggers out there: Jerry of The Joe Cribbs Car Wash. So, read on to get his wildly entertaining take on Auburn’s season so far, the Tony Franklin soap opera and if Tommy Tuberville would rather have dinner with Nick Saban or Bobby Petrino. (And be sure to click here to see our responses to Jerry’s questions about the Hogs.) Quick editors’ note: questions were exchanged before Franklin got canned, so, yes, we are aware that he has been booted.

Give us your quick assessment of Auburn’s season so far. Is it safe to assume that things haven’t gone the way fans had hoped or expected?

Uh, yes. Quite, quite safe. Not so much on the defensive side of things, where save for one iffy half against LSU the Tigers have been every bit as good as advertised and then some. But of course, that only does so much good when you’re working with the worst offense, bar none, I’ve ever seen on the Plains. The blowout of Louisiana-Monroe was palatable and the comfortable win over Southern Miss may have even been “tasty,” but since then the team has sunk to its lowest levels–again, without question–since 2003. Especially when contrasted with the Tide’s rocket-ship ride to No. 2 in the country, it’s not the best of times for Auburn fans. In fact, it’s pretty much exactly the opposite.

Obviously the quick scouting report on Auburn this year is defense = scarily good, offense = scarily bad. Take us beyond those stereotypes…what are the Tigers’ strengths and weaknesses that we should watch for?

What’s funny is that I’m not sure you can go too far beyond those stereotypes–the defense honestly doesn’t have a single glaring weakness and likewise there’s nothing this offense as currently constructed does well. But the Hogs are catching this defense at the right time–the Tigers are way, way banged up, with top corner (and arguably the unit’s best player) “doubtful” in Jarraud Powers and FDA-certified DT monster Sen’Derrick Marks nursing a sore ankle. Particularly with Powers out, the best way to attack the D is to put multiple wideouts on the field and go after the corners–freshmen Neiko Thorpe and D’Antoine Hood will be terrific a couple of years from now (and Thorpe’s not far off now) but they’re still freshmen. With Auburn’s offense, who the bloody hell knows at this point, but forcing Auburn’s QBs–the erratic-if-electric Kodi Burns and rag-armed-if-accurate Chris Todd–to throw is very rarely a bad thing.

When we first saw offensive coordinator Tony Franklin at Auburn, he was implementing a new offense practically overnight and leading you guys to 400+ yards in your bowl win. That was certainly an impressive beginning…where have things gone wrong since then?

The specific details vary depending on who you talk to, but there’s not much doubt at this point that whether because Franklin did a bad job of selling his offense to the other offensive assistants–all of which have been with Tubby for ages–or whether they outright rejected it, Franklin and his staff members weren’t on the same page. The result was the rocky outings over the first few weeks, at which point Tubby stepped in and demanded Auburn install some new sets to try and get some yards on the ground, which only made worse the offense’s lack of focus and deep divisions amongst the staff. This week things came to a head and voila, no more Franklin.

What’s the daily count of flaming bags of dog shit being delivered to Franklin’s doorstep? At this rate, will he be back next year?

Up until his firing, I’m guessing he’d probably maxed out at about 4.7 bags a day, and obviously, that rate was at least somewhere between 2 and 2.5 too many dog-shit bags per day to keep him employed. What’s been interesting is that between the bizarre timing of Franklin’s firing and the increasing attention paid to the inability and/or outright refusal of Auburn’s staff to work with him, many Auburn fans–maybe even a majority, by this point–have now turned their ire towards Tuberville, blaming him for the blind loyalty to his other assistants and not letting Franklin run things the way he wanted to from the get-go. Me personally? There’s blood on all their hands, as you don’t have an apocalyptic performance of the kind Auburn showed against Vandy without incompetence across the board.

Would Tommy Tuberville rather have dinner with Bobby Petrino or Nick Saban? How will the history between Petrino and Tuberville (”Jetgate”, etc) affect the game?

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With Razorback fans bracing themselves for another Saturday whipping, we thought it would be a good time to check in with a Gator expert. Joel from The Bull Gator was kind enough to answer our questions about this year’s Florida squad. Read on to his take on the Gator’s strengths and weaknesses, last year’s Heisman Trophy race and the love that Florida fans continue to feel for Darth Visor. (And click here to see our answers to his questions.) Many thanks, Joel. And now, on with the show …

Give us a quick scouting report on this year’s Florida team: strengths, weaknesses, etc.

Florida’s biggest strength is the capabilities of its offense. Its biggest weakness is the coaches’ lack of realization of those capabilities. The Gators have the talent and firepower to put 40+ points on anyone. They also have the playbook to do it. So far in 2008, we haven’t seen it all come together for an entire game. Florida is averaging 35.5 points per game this season – which is nothing to put down – but this is a team built to do even more. The Ole Miss game exposed the fact that when behind in games, Urban Meyer and Dan Mullen panic and only go with the guys named Tebow and Harvin. The playbook is practically closed and the same 3-5 plays are used in hopes we can will a win.

In pressure situations, the Gators get away from what worked and go into panic mode. Not that I should complain too much about being 3-1 with big wins over hated rivals Miami and Tennessee, but the Ole Miss game made me very nervous for the rest of the season.

Other strengths include the starting defensive ends – Carlos Dunlap is a star in the making – and the linebackers. However, a weakness is still the secondary. Although vastly improved over last year, the Ole Miss game proved they are still a ways off from being among the SEC’s elite units.

What are fans’ expectations for this season?

Whoever the coach is will always tell you that Florida doesn’t look beyond winning the SEC East. Once that goal’s accomplished, it’s winning the SEC Championship. Then we can actually discuss the national title. Most fans I know think slightly different. We start at the top and then settle for the rest. Sure winning the SEC East is nice. Taking home a SEC title is all good and well. But fans want a national championship. The 2006 one is so fresh in our minds, we want another one. After losing to Ole Miss, we didn’t think “it’s okay, we still control our destiny in the East, win out and we’re in the SEC title game.” No, we thought “crap, how can we get back in the hunt for the national title?” Sure we’d settle for a 10-win season with a conference championship if we have to, but our expectations are a national title. We feel Florida has the program and talent to compete with anyone, so there’s really nothing else.

Do you feel last week’s surprising loss to Ole Miss was a fluke, or did it reveal real problems that might plague the team the rest of the season?

The way Florida played for the first three quarters against Miami and at certain points during the Tennessee game, I actually don’t believe it was a fluke. The Ole Miss game exposed the team to itself I think. Too much reliance on only Tebow and Harvin. Not utilizing the entire playbook. Bad play calling when behind. Despite wins by at least 23 points in the first three games, we saw some holes in Florida’s offense that weren’t expected. But watching those first few games, it was also apparent that some team could easily sneak up on the Gators. Ole Miss did exactly that.

It’s hard to say there are problems that will plague Florida for the rest of the season, because they are fixable issues. The Gators have the right coaches and players; they just have to utilize both effectively.

Do you have a hard time sleeping at night knowing that Tim Tebow wrongly won the Heisman last year instead of Darren McFadden?

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Thanks to the feverish efforts of Jimmy Carter and Henry Kissinger, a group of Texas and Arkansas fans were able to come together recently and discuss the Longhorns and Razorbacks in a spirit of good cheer and non-violence. Surely a Nobel Peace Prize awaits these masters of diplomacy for their efforts. Specifically, we here at Razorback Expats exchanged questions with Peter Bean, co-editor of Burnt Orange Nation, an outstanding Longhorns blog. Read below to get the lowdown on the strengths and weaknesses of this year’s Texas squad, how the rivalry with Arkansas isn’t such a huge deal to most Longhorn fans (prepare to be outraged!), and where Hogs fans making the trip to Austin can find a drink to ease the pain they are likely to feel after Saturday’s game. (To see our responses to Peter’s questions, just click here.)

Give us a quick scouting report on this year’s Texas team: strengths, weaknesses, etc.

Quick and dirty: The offense has been a one-man show behind Colt McCoy (who leads the team in rushing and is third nationally in passer rating), the offensive line is good and getting better, we have two steady seniors at wideout, and question marks beyond that. Of particular concern is the mediocre start from the running backs; Texas fans are desperately hoping the explosive Fozzy Whittaker gets healthy quickly.

Defensively, Texas is giving up yards, but not points. As my co-author notes, however, it doesn’t look sustainable as the competition stiffens. This young group is going to take some licks as it grows up.

What are the fan’s expectations for this year’s team?

I wrote a lengthy post on just this topic back in June, urging Longhorns fans to view 2008 as a chance to build for a national title run in 2009. That’s not to say this year’s team can’t be great, but at least three teams on Texas’ schedule (OU, Missouri, Texas Tech) are hitting peaks in the cycle, while Texas is young and building towards a peak in ‘09.

I think a lot of fans are behind that idea, but make no mistake about it: the vast majority of Texas fans (’09 enthusiasts included) expect this year’s team to finish no worse than 9-3 or 10-2. So expectations remain very high.

What Longhorn player or players is poised to have a big game against Arkansas?

This one’s tough to figure without first asking you guys whether your pass defense is as good as the numbers indicate (or if you’ve just faced mediocre QBs). If your secondary is strong, Arkansas may actually have a shot to frustrate Texas’ offensive machine, which has rolled behind McCoy’s stellar play despite the lack of meaningful help from the tailbacks. One offensive player to watch will be Fozzy Whittaker, if he’s healthy: He pretty clearly seems The Guy that the ‘Horns will need to break out from the tailback position, and he has the talent to do it.

Defensively, Razorback fans should worry about how to stop Lamarr Houston and Sergio Kindle, both of whom are going to spend a lot of time in your backfield if your offensive line play through three games is any indication of what we can expect on Saturday.

We can only assume that the Longhorns and their fans are quaking with fear as the mighty Hogs get set to roll into Austin. Is there anything about the way the Hogs match up with Texas that causes you concern?

As noted in the previous answer, if Arkansas can slow down Texas’ passing offense, the Longhorns aren’t rushing the ball well yet and it’s plausible Arkansas could make a game of things.

Hard to believe, but it’s been 17 years since Arkansas last played football in the Southwest Conference. All these years later, what level of animosity/rivalry do Texas fans’ feel towards Arkansas? When it comes to the teams you hate, are we even on your radar screen anymore?

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